I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize