she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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