I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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