so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
