I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize