Someone shit on the floor
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
