The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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