wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Randomize
