How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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