ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
