Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
