This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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