respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Randomize
