And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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