butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
