I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
