I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Randomize
