I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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