Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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