I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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