i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
