New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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