Your face is a jimmy john
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
