I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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