i just google imaged poop.
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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