her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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