Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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