oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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