I swear she didn't look like that last week.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
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Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize