It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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