i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I'm both gender and math confused
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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