remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
