how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
