ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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