Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
did i walk over a car last night?
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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