i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
These 23 People Had Coworkers From Hell
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this