I smell stomach acid.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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