I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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