He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
