So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
