You work out of a Hotel?
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Randomize
