Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
my shit smells like andre
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
These Are 23 Of The Most Uncomfortable Questions You Can Ask
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
The 17 Most Horrible Things Said To Online Daters
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience