i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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