Just fell off a train. Bad.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
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