me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
