so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Randomize
