white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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