it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
