He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
