would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
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